Checking-in: My Sistuhs, Are Y’all Alright?

 “I’m not hustling for my worth. I’m worthy. When I came out of my mom’s womb, I came in worthy.” –Viola Davis

Ladies, how y’all doin? Are you keeping up with your workout plans and still drinking plenty if not enough water? Did you finally do the big chop, locking up, or letting that fro grow naturally?  It is 2018, I know some of you have already took charge and claiming that this year is your year of excellence; however, I have to check in and see how you’re REALLY doing out here in these streets. Let us as beautiful black women not forget that our primary goal is to be healthy in all aspects of our lives—which includes our physical, mental and spiritual health. We don’t have time for a ‘9-5 job’ giving out tons of workloads that is incongruous with our pay rate. We don’t have time for 45th ignoring contrary blueprint advice from my president, Barack Obama and speaking alternative facts instead. We don’t have time to be ashy. We don’t have time for gossip, fake circles, hair shrinkage, low credit scores, flexing on the gram and wannabe Wakanda kings—boy bye, SIT DOWN.

It is vital for us to divert our mindset from the negative energy to consuming our thoughts with positivity filled with hope, love and peace.  Most importantly, we have to be true to ourselves. What we post on social media have to match up to how we’re living in real life. You cannot post a selfie captioning, “I’m so happy, life is good” and then logging off 5 minutes later crying about not having your life together. Focus. Keep your attention on what truly matters—no amount of likes, views and comments will ever satisfy or complete you. You can have it all together by doing the work. Real work equals real results. Nobody wants to see you living your best life more than you do, take the initiative steps to get there.

 “I discovered that joy is not the negation of pain, but rather acknowledging the presence of pain and feeling happiness in spite of it.” –Lupita Nyong’O

God is simply amazing. We think that we have life all figured out and planned accordingly—then He steps in and create a whole new different path. I believe the most beautiful part of living is the art of starting over. If you can sit here and complain about how he mistreated you and how you should have left a long time ago, you can also practice gratitude. Be thankful for second chances. A chance to love again, gain wisdom and live life through your purpose. The feeling of resentment, shame and disappointment will always be there until you learn forgiveness. You will never experience joy if you don’t allow your heart to forgive. Accept that there is still pain but do not dwell in it—trust the healing process. What happen has happened, there is no reversal through the hands of time.  Learn from your mistakes and move on. That is the true beauty of loving yourself. Give yourself the satisfaction of letting go and let God. Why waste energy being stuck in the past when life is happening right now at this very moment? Be present. This is the chance to continue writing your story, make it a good one. The choice is up to you.

“Just as we have the power to try and shape culture, we also have the power to undo the culture that does not serve us well.” –Janelle Monae

Surroundings. Understand that your surroundings will either make you or break you. It is so important to be in a circle with individuals who are like-minded and cares for your being.  If you don’t have any friends, make one! I learned in life that you cannot be successful alone, you need a strong support team to help you along the way. I live by this motto daily: POSITIVE VIBES ONLY. Pay attention to how someone treats you. Remove anyone who makes you feel less or unworthy of yourself. You should never be around naysayers who belittles you and throw slick jabs on the side.  Jealousy is an ugly thing. A true friend will be proud of your accomplishments and not secretly waiting your downfalls.  As I grew older, I realized not everyone was meant to be in my circle. Some people were placed as a lesson learned and in most case, seasonal. I  found a new strength within me to just walk away from anything that just didn’t serve me any good or purpose. I’m thankful to say that I have gained new friends who have been a blessing (they know who they are)! If you’re lucky enough to have your “Flossy Possy’s” around then amen to that! It’s great to have your childhood friends with you growing and flourishing through the good and bad times. I’m sorry Drake, but the line, “No New Friends” does not apply to me. I’m all about sisterhood, women empowerment, love and support. Have a seat at the table, you can sit with me!

Let me know how are you doing so far in 2018. Are you still friends with your childhood friends? Did you have to drop some friends who were not worthy of your friendship? New man? New job? Baby on the way? Please leave a comment below!

Until next time…

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